A Thread about saying no to New York
Fashion consultant Shibon Kennedy spent 2 decades grinding in NYC before moving her entire life to Barcelona. Here's what she learned
Hello Threads of Conversation friends! Today I’ve got an interview with fashion consultant, creative director and life-inspiration Shibon Kennedy, who recently left New York to build a new life in Barcelona. (You might also remember her from last year’s piece on why all the cool girls have red hair).
In fashion, we’re often tricked into thinking that a successful career looks like living in a small, overpriced apartment in one of the four fashion capitals, stressed to the eyeballs and drowning in work.
Shibon did this for two decades - very successfully - but like all true originals, she knew she had to go her own way. So, at 41, she packed up her life and moved to Spain. Here, we chat about the realities of her move, and what her life and career look like these days.
Over on the podcast, you can listen to me discussing the recent fashion month with Dazed’s Emma Davidson, chatting to Instagram research king Samutaro about his career and discussing the eight items of clothing that define designer Jawara Alleyne’s journey in fashion. You can also listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube.
With fashion, I’m often thinking about how to build both a sustainable career and a sustainable life. One where you can actually enjoy it, where you're present in it. Instead of always calculating or networking or hustling.
That's exactly where I was coming from. My soul was looking for where I was going to move. And it makes sense it was Barcelona, because Barcelona was the first city that made me fall in love with European living, back when I was 20 years old.
What are the changes you’ve noticed in yourself since moving?
I’ve seen such a shift in my wellbeing, in my stress levels (or lack thereof) and just finding joy in life and sharing that joy with people in a way I wasn't able to do before. Because in New York, all of us are there to hustle. And I get it; I get why we do it. There was just something more that I felt I needed in life, and I didn't want to look back with regret.
Did you grow up in New York?
I grew up in LA - Redondo Beach, suburban LA. I moved to New York from 18 until I was 40.
The thing that I find fascinating and inspiring about your story is I feel like most people don't even consider that there could be another option. It's either live in a major city, or completely quit fashion. Move upstate and start a bakery, or keep grinding. There's no sense of a middle ground. When did the idea of doing something different start percolating?
Well, I will say this. I'm extraordinarily lucky in that I was raised with parents that always taught me not to be afraid and encouraged me to pursue what I wanted.
I remember thinking about a decade ago, “Maybe I’ll break up with New York”. Right before the pandemic I kept thinking, okay time to get serious about moving to Europe. I was hyping myself up to start the process for Lisboa, but I was still too nervous. And then 2020 changed that plan altogether.
How did you settle on Barcelona? What were your criteria?
It's almost like my soul knew before I did, because of that discovery aged 20. Since moving here I've unpacked all my old journals, and Barcelona featured a lot. So it obviously cracked open something in me at a young age.
The spring before my 40th birthday, I was having lunch with my friend the photographer Camila Falquez, who was raised in Barcelona. She said, “How do you feel about Barcelona?” I told her I loved it. And she said, “Well, my parents want to do a house swap”.
I'd never entertained this idea. The New Yorker in me was like, “No, no, no, no, no - I can't do a house swap for a month!” And then I was like, wait, why wouldn't I? So I did a house swap with them and three days in, it was like, “Oh my God, I'm moving to Barcelona.”
Can you tell me about the timeline and the practicalities of actually making the move happen?
I wouldn't necessarily recommend the way I did it! I think I'm very organized, but for me it was chaotic.
After Paris Fashion Week in February 2023, I came straight to Barcelona, met with a lawyer, met with a real estate agent and started getting going. The thing that I hadn't factored in was the visa process. It was a new visa - I'm on the digital nomad. Looking back, I would give myself more time to meet with more lawyers. My lawyer was not great, and that really, really delayed things.
And then on the other side, when you land, it's going to take a year to get your bearings. I'm not old, but I'm not young. So I have things that are like my practices, and I had to refabricate those in a way that makes sense here - or even dismantle some of them because some don't work for me anymore. Every day is an exploration of that, you know?
In terms of work, were you worried about breaking the news to people, and losing out on work?
I've done a bit of work here, but there's also a difference in pay scale in Spain to New York or Paris. So I've done jobs in Paris. I've done jobs in London, but I mostly fly back to the States. People don't have a problem with me living here - or we work it into the agreement. Perhaps there’s a flight contribution, or there's mileage. Every job is different and it's just a learning curve.
Can you give more detail about the differences between the way you worked in New York and the way you work now?
Oh my God, the way I worked in New York was all work, no play. Okay, all work, some play, no sleep and just grind. I mean listen, I built a career that was able to pay for me to move abroad to have this life. I'm proud of all the work I've done and I'm really proud of the journey, But now it's like, everything is really intentional and deliberate.
For example, the other day I was hit up by the PR for an actor - I do very limited red carpet, but I have my clients and I keep it tight. I have to connect with them on a soul level. So we had a call because I wanted to make sure if they really wanted me to work with her, that we connected on a deeper level. And I think that sort of depth and intention is something that I'm seeing more of in my work.
Even now with my team, I tell them all the time, “What we're NOT going to do is stress about clothes.” Because I have a different mindset. That calm, making sure that my team is doing okay and that they realize that there are bigger and more important things than fashion. I think that's a very different way of working.
What do you think instigated that shift - to pack up your entire life and ship it across an ocean?
I've been doing a deep dive on myself for around 7 years. Really looking inward, trying to show up as my best self. Being able to look in the mirror and love the person looking back at me.
There have been so many shifts in my life that gave me the courage to move to Spain. But the calm and the high vibration I’ve found here - it takes active work. So on a down day, I actively sit with my negative thoughts.
What do you miss the most about your old life?
The two things I miss about my old life are my friends and the spices that I can get in New York. I cook a lot and some very specific spices are hard to come by here. But honestly, I don't miss a lot about New York. I can honestly say that I love New York, but I'm not in love with New York anymore.
What's your routine like in Spain?
I wake up, usually do a lounging morning and then I exercise. And then I usually do work or get inspired or run around, ride my bike. Every day depends on whether I have a job on. The longer I've been in my career, the more last minute they’ve become. Because of the time difference, a lot of times I'll get confirmed at midnight. And then I have to stay up til 4am to prep for my team or get a pitch deck over. So that's definitely different.
What's the percentage split in terms of Spain versus travelling?
I would say I spend about a third of my time travelling. I go away for pretty long stints - the last one was a month, before that was about 3 weeks. I will say this: I'm very proud of myself, because on my last trip to New York, I was there for four weeks and I had no stress on that trip. I couldn't believe it. On paper there were so many moments that I should have been stressed, but I just dialled in high vibration Shibon.
Do you work with Spanish clients or is it still more international?
I started working with Spanish clients probably nine months ago. The first year was a little rocky - I was going through some family stuff and it was very heavy and I really didn't have the capacity to do much. So when I came out of that, it was full steam ahead and I got jobs right away. I've done jobs with production companies here. I did an independent film, I've done a Netflix job. People come to me for various things.
I also have to be willing to lower my rates, because I wouldn't work here if I only gave them my New York rates. It's not realistic, you know? The reality of moving somewhere with a smaller industry is that your lifestyle improves, but also you can't command the same rates.
If someone wanted to follow a similar path, what advice would you give them?
Do ample amounts of research. I would suggest someone tries to do a month somewhere - even if you can do a week here, a week there. Try and immerse yourself in the culture. Reach out to people, ask questions. People want to help people's dreams come true. If I can help people pursue their dreams and their goals, hit me up!
My parents always said, if it was easy then everybody would be doing it. These things take some gumption and courage. I fought for this, and it was so worth it.
Find Shibon on Instagram here and here.
Threads of the week
Experimenting with a headband this week - this one is from my local chemist. Worn with Dries van Noten jeans, Prada sandals, longsleeve tee from Total Luxury Spa, military liner from my trip to Japan and sunglasses from Dries van Noten x Linda Farrow.
Loose Threads
Very happy to see one of my fave writer/ podcaster/ Substack OGs Phoebe Lovatt at the Miu Miu Literary Club in Milan. I wasn’t there, but I loved listening back to her interview with Lauren Elkin. Also really enjoyed her recent episode with artist Martine Syms.
I haven’t read this yet, but I want to.
A fascinating mini history of one of the world’s most ubiquitous condiments.
I’ve been doing some consulting on Liberty’s beautiful line of fragrances, Liberty LBTY. This collaboration I commissioned with artist Orfeo Taguiri is a particular favourite, as is this very satisfying ASMR video. Oh, also this interview with perfumer Frank Voelkl (also the guy behind Glossier You and Santal 33!)
Follow Threads of Conversation on Instagram and TikTok, and subscribe below for more podcasts, essays and interviews.